Last Day in Bali

Today is my last day in Bali and I am content to say that I have done what I wanted to do. I have work that offers me money that is not my passion and unfortunately I agreed to complete a project by today, so I will have to spend a couple hours on that (I procrastinated due to exhaustion when I could have gotten it done the other day, and so I must do it now). But, fortunately, I don’t feel drawn to do anything else today except relax, take in the energy of this place, possibly exercise (maybe a spin class), and of course, eat good food.

When I was on the back of the gojek (Indonesian ride share) motorbike going from Sanur to Canggu the other day, I suddenly saw a sign that said “Polish” and a second word I cannot remember. I saw it a few times on the front gates of a big building and felt it possibly was a sign about going to Poland. Then, a few seconds later, when I looked again, suddenly it said “Polisi.” Sometimes I see things that morph or disappear, or perhaps aren’t there all the time but that shift to send me a message. I felt like this was one of those times, because it certainly had just said “Polish” on several of the signs only moments before. Earlier, I had asked for some confirmation that it was time to leave Bali and any guidance with what I’m meant to do. I still feel hesitant about the next steps after Thailand, but that seems like it’s more in my head than in my heart.

I thought throughout my whole time in Bali that I would find some sort of treasure, some sort of energetic keepsake that I would want to keep with me from this island – perhaps a piece of jewelry (as I often feel power in jewelry and stones). Whenever I saw artisans with jewelry or shops, I would look, and sometimes I looked for a long while or at the same pieces over again, but I couldn’t find anything that made me feel resonance or joy. It felt like I would be forcing myself to wear the bracelet or earrings, etc., and that it just wasn’t quite right or quite “me.” I found this quizzical since a lot of the jewelry was beautiful until yesterday when I realized that I don’t want to take anything from the island.

That’s what people do, they come here and they take. That’s part of what brings me sorrow when I connect with the island. I don’t want to do that. Of course, I have come here and partaken also. I’ve enjoyed the luxury of the affordable food, spa treatments, and home stays. But hopefully I’ve been conscious about it and hopefully I have given back to the island with my love, understanding, and appreciation for her. The time I spent in the oceans around the southern part of the island were to connect with her energetically and to commune.

At the ocean in Uluwatu’s Dream Beach, I found two beautiful treasures from the sea (pictured below). I considered taking one with me, but the answer I got from the beach was that although it would be okay with it if I did, that really they belonged here with the island. And so I kissed them and put them deeper into the ocean so that they wouldn’t be taken, at least for a while. As I left, I saw people with a bag full of shells and treasures, taking them away and I felt sad.

So for now I will sit here and enjoy this view from my glass doors with one open, listening to the fountain, birds, dogs, distant traffic, and town sounds while I work and then go and take in a bit more of this place before I fly off to Bangkok tomorrow. Thank you, Bali, for all the lessons, information, beauty of your nature, for sharing some of your story with me, and helping me to understand more about this world.